Brancott Estate has come to the rescue of nervous early-stage daters across the nation with the perfect guide to bluffing it as a wine expert! The leading New Zealand wine brand’s wine expert, Vicky Bryksa, has compiled the top tips to help people across the nation fake it to make it.
Justin Bieber said it best: “Have confidence in what you say. Even if you’re not an expert, you just need to act like one. And if all else fails, just make something up.”
Vicky Bryksa said: “We know those early dates with a prospective partner are crucial in understanding if a potential relationship has any legs, so we thought we’d give a helping hand to all who want to impress their date with easy wine knowledge. It’s foolproof, but we don’t take responsibility if they dump you after the second date!”
So, with all these wine tips in hand, go forth and impress, but remember, wine is meant to be enjoyed RESPONSIBLY!
OH, NAH NAH, WHAT’S MY NAME?
Before your date, familiarise yourself with the most popular wine regions and the types of wine they produce. We all love a namedrop, but instead of saying how you met Drake in 2019, namedrop the regions you researched – your date will be instantly impressed – do it subtly, of course because no one likes a show-off! For example, ‘let’s go for a Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc, I love how exuberant and vibrant this wine is thanks to its unique climate!’
LEARN THE LINGO
Throw around some wine terms like ‘silky tannins’, ‘beautiful acidity’ and ‘minerality’. Even if you’re unsure what they mean, say it with conviction, and you’ll sound like a pro. If your date asks for a definition of the term, politely excuse yourself and head to the loo for a quick Google search; not too long, though, because a lengthy stay in the loo never impresses a date!
WHAT’S YOUR FLAVOUR?
You can also impress a date by knowing the tasting ‘notes’ of the wines. A basic guide below:
RED WINE TERMS – Focus on red & black fruit: Redcurrant, cranberry, raspberry, red cherry, black plum, strawberry, etc.
WHITE WINE TERMS – Think about white fruit: Apple, pear, grapefruit, lime, lemon, gooseberry, lychee, melon, green bell pepper.
If you can get a real whiff of a good white wine, just say that it has lovely citrusy and apple notes!
SAY IT DON’T SPRAY IT
A first date is NOT the time to mispronounce your wines… see below for a phonetic guide to your date’s favourite tipples:
Sauvignon Blanc – SO-VIN-YON BLONGK grape
Tempranillo – TEMP-RAN-EEYO grape
Rioja – REE-OKHA
Pinot Grigio – PEE-NO GREEDGE-EEO grape
Chardonnay – SHAR-DON-AYE grape
Champagne – SHAM-PAIN grape
Viognier – VEE-ON-YAY grape
Garnacha – GAR-NAT-CHA grape
Chateauneuf Du Pape – SHAT-OH-NERF-DOO-PAP region
THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX
Show your date that you’re not basic and ask for a chilled red wine instead of ordering it at room temperature!! Ooooh, adventurous!! People believe red wines should be enjoyed at room temperature only, so suggesting it be chilled makes you memorable and differentiates you from other suitors (you’re probably their third date of the week, so you have to stand out!). Light wines and young wines, such as Pinot Noir for example can be enjoyed slightly chilled! But definitely don’t attempt it with a full-bodied Cabernet Sauvignon or aged Riojan Gran Reserva!
ROUND ROUND BABY ROUND ROUND
The art of swirling – a simple way to show expertise. Swirl the wine slowly in the glass, looking inquisitively as if the movement of the wine is the most interesting thing you’ve ever seen in your life. This is to intensify wine aromas – suggest your date smells the wine before swirling and after – you’ll see the difference for yourself!
Then take a small sip, smirk and react to the explosion of flavours. Swish the wine around your mouth! For extra panache, make a little ‘mmm’ sound. Practice this movement before your date to perfect the move and lessen the risk of spilling the wine, which won’t bode well if you have on your best white dress or shirt!
No matter the reason or time of the year, Brancott Estate invites all wine lovers to taste life on the flip side, uplifting convivial moments and helping see things from a new perspective.
Brancott Estate is available nationwide across all major supermarkets, including Sainsbury’s, Tesco, Morrisons, Asda and Waitrose, at RRP £9.50.
